All four eyes are closed.
This was the best I could do.
If I am a humorous writer at all it is because of James. I met him when I was an intern at the Arizona Senate and he was a Constituent Services Rep. The legislative session is a very busy time, but the majority of the year (interim) is full of looooong, boring hours. James and I would send each other funny emails all day long to pass the time.
Once I become an Assistant Analyst our offices were very close to each other. I would send an email and, if the office was really quiet, I could hear the ding in his office announcing that the email had arrived. I'd listen for him to start laughing before I would walk down there to join in the laughter.
Somehow, we got started emailing each other real articles that we had altered in someway. They started really simple with just a few details changed but after some time we started changing just about everything in the article. We called them "alticles" (for altered article). We actually have two books full of all the ones we wrote. We definitely had our favorite subjects- Governor Hull (and her oven desk), Secretary of State Betsy Bayless (and her mobile command unit), and a certain Republican Staffer who shall remain nameless (because I don't want to get sued and subpoenaed to share all the articles we wrote about him or her.) These alticles are chock full of inside jokes but I'll try to find a few that I could share on the blog. They are golden.