Michael and I love to watch old episodes of Seinfeld. One of our favorites is the Pimple Popper, M.D. Are you familiar with it? Jerry goes on a revenge date with a dermatologist because he was annoyed that she was bragging about saving lives. He goes off on a tirade and calls her Pimple Popper, M.D. right before a man thanks her for saving his life after he got skin cancer. My favorite tag line from the episode is where Jerry snaps his fingers and says "skin cancer" in a tone of annoyance because he forgot that a dermatologist treats that. It's hilarious.
But there is nothing funny about skin cancer (oh my god, I sound like the beginning of a public service announcement). I got really serious about sun protection when I was about 18. Most people get more tan in the summer. I get more pale. I go to my dermatologist every year for a complete head to toe skin check. I've had numerous "iffy" moles and bumps taken off.
A couple of days ago I found a very strange bump on my head. I will spare you the yucky details but I was very concerned about it. I emailed a picture to Kendra (she's a doctor. It's very convenient to have one of those in the family). She assured me it wasn't melanoma but she couldn't tell what it was in an emailed picture with lots of hair in the way (and she calls herself a doctor!) She told me to go to the doctor and have it checked and biopsied if need be. So I started doing some research (you know, with google) and came to the conclusion that it was a basal cell carcinoma.
This is a picture of me.
These are the risk factors for basal cell carcinoma:
Fair skin- CHECK
Blond or red hair- CHECK AGAIN
Blue or Green eyes- DOUBLE CHECK
Lives in the Southwest- CHECK, CHECK, CHECK
Family history of basal cell carcinoma- Big ol fat CHECK
History of blistering sunburn as a child- HELL YES CHECK
Previous basal cell carcinoma- NOT YET
Weakened immune system- NO (Hey, I've got something going for me)
Exposure to arsenic, coal, industrial tar or paraffin (do candles count for paraffin?)
So, I called my dermatologist this morning. I couldn't get in for an emergency appointment for 3 weeks. My dermatologist is kind of famous. I've never actually met her, I just see the Physician Assistant. I think I need a new dermatologist. So I went to my regular doctor. Good news. I have an infected benign cyst. Well, that's still kind of gross, but it's not cancer. Score 1 for the pale blond girl in Phoenix.
Anyway, I will be no less diligent about my sun protection just because it's not a basal cell. And you shouldn't either. Use sun block. Stay out of the sun between 10 and 4 (or between May and November in my case). Wear sunglasses and a hat. I need to be better about the hat. Don't tan. Wear protective clothing. Embrace the pale. I do.