Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Caloric ice cream to start the week and a scorpion to end

I have been trying to write this post for more than a week.  I have started and stopped about six times now.  My apologies for being totally lame.

We have to go allllllllllllllllll the way back to February 27th.  Good lord.  We have to go back to last month!  That's really bad.

After two weeks of not walking, Ginger was released from her arthritis house arrest and was able to walk again.  It's now been two weeks since we've been walking her again and she is still doing fine, so hopefully it was just a one time thing. 
That night I bought pints for Michael and I to eat while we watched The Walking Dead.  He tried to say that his ice cream was less caloric than mine because it had 240 calories.  Then I asked him how many servings there were per pint.  The look on his face when he realized he was about to eat 960 calories to my 280 calories was priceless.  Like, I still wish I was recording it. 

His ice cream. 

My ice cream.  I may have a Halo Top problem.  I may need professional help. 

Monday the 27th was a laundry day.  Ginger will NEVER not sleep on laundry waiting to go in the washer. 

It was hat day at preschool.  This is what Elliott chose to wear.  He said it wouldn't matter that it said Spencer because the kids in preschool can't read cursive anyway. 

We stopped at the park before school.  I hadn't talked to Michael all morning so I texted him two pictures to let him know we were alive.  Just a little wife to husband proof of life. 


Elliott got pulled pork on his forehead at dinner and I was afraid his brains were oozing out. 
And this is what it means to have sons.  You just randomly walk by the bathroom when one of them is in the shower and see Bowser Junior on a motorcycle. 


Monday night Ginger used me as a footrest on the couch. 

And I loved it. 
On Tuesday the 28th both Michael and I were home because our work schedules got totally altered that week because Michael flew to Vermont for his grandfather's funeral.  We took Elliott out to breakfast after Spencer went to school and then went shopping where I bought this wrap dress at a consignment store.  I thought it was funny because it looks like you have to be a stick to wear it, but it's just an illusion from the wrap. 
 Elliott used a bath bomb that he had been given as a Valentine gift for a mid-day bath. The red thing was a bouncy ball that was in the bath bomb. 

Spencer quizzed Elliott on addition, subtraction and multiplication flash cards after dinner.  At Elliott's request.  He's going to know all of his facts before he even starts Kindergarten. 

On Wednesday March 1st Elliott and I drove out to Agritopia and got some treats from Mr. Chad's restaurant.  Then we went to the park again.   Elliott got chocolate zucchini bread and was relieved it didn't taste like zucchini.  Which is weird, because why order it if you are worried it will taste like zucchini. 
Oh, I got coffee too and this black and white basset was at the coffee shop.  I *almost* stole/basset-napped him. 

Wednesday was mismatch day at preschool.  This was my idea.  Not bad. Not bad.


And I discovered a bizarre bruise on Spencer's ear that night.  Only Spencer would get a bruise on his helix. 


Ginger was just her typical cute before bedtime. 


I worked on Thursday the 2nd.  I took down my February door decorations in between 1.4 million therapy sessions. 

I loved the froggies, so I moved them into my office.  They lasted for a week, fell off the wall and then a kid ruined them. 
On Friday this son of a bitch was crawling across my kitchen floor and I prepared dinner in my bare feet.  Michael wasn't home so I had to deal with it on my own.  It involved a lot of smacking and screaming. Then I made him dispose of the body when he got home. 
On Saturday the 4th we changed Elliott's bed sheets which means we organized his stuffed animals.  This is everyone he sleeps with and he will wake up in the middle of the night and then notice if anybody is missing. 

We also got our passport pictures taken, which cost $60 which I find to be completely unacceptable. 

Oh my god.  I did it. 


Monday, March 6, 2017

A slow week post-holiday

When I last left you we had just returned from a trip to Tucson for President's Day weekend.

I worked on Tuesday the 21st.  We were doing auditory processing activities that day and I let each kid print out whatever picture they wanted (within reason) to do for quick breaks. 

I picked Scooby Doo for myself.  
On Wednesday the 22nd I took a bunch of crazy pictures to be entered into contests for a Facebook party I was part of. 

This was a picture of a vacuum, a mop and a sponge all in the same picture. 
"What you're doing right at this very moment" 
(we had just gotten home from school and Elliott was showing me his drawing of him on an airplane). 

"The item that is to your left".
I also worked on Thursday the 23rd.  I dropped Elliott off at daycare and then went through the drive-thru at Dunkin Donuts to get a coffee.  This day was walking around the car and brushing all of his kid's teeth while his wife slowly inched forward.  It was bizarre and probably not very safe. 
Spencer's school had an anniversary celebration on Friday the 24th.  I took a ton of pictures, but they all have too many identifying features, so these are the "safe" ones that don't reveal too much. 


They opened up the time capsule from five years ago and made a new one to be opened in ten years. 
On Saturday the 25th we met Josh, Laura, Sara and Samantha in Maricopa where they had a hotel room for the weekend.  We did bowling all together, then Laura and I drank wine while the dads took the kids to play arcade games and laser tag.



There was a pile-up in their hotel room before we left to come home. 



Thursday, March 2, 2017

President's Day Weekend

The Friday before President's Day I taught Art Masterpiece in Spencer's call.  He was thrilled to see me. 

I mean, look at that face. 

That evening we drove to Tucson.  My parents were at Lake Tahoe having a snowy ski vacation and Michael's parents were in Vermont, so we picked up some Eegee's for dinner. Not familiar with Eegee's?

I told Michael to go get some vodka out of my dad's bar.   He got the good stuff. 
On Saturday I went out to lunch with my friend Lisa.  I haven't seen her in probably 8 years, so we made sure to get a picture together. 

Um, not really.

But I did get a picture of the beer menu.  Of which I drank none. 

Then we drove clear across town to Samantha's 5th birthday party at Peter Piper Pizza.  

On Sunday Lisa joined my family for breakfast so she could talk to my dad about becoming active in politics.  She brought 24 donuts with her. 

That afternoon we watched this little guy feast on the prickly pear cactus for quite some time.  I guess he was mad he didn't get any donuts. 

I took the pictures through a window and screen.  They're not bad, considering all the interference. 




On Sunday night we had Jerry, Lois and my Uncle Terry over for a dinner to celebrate Jerry's birthday.  Ginger was all sorts of thrilled. 
It was the first time all the family got together since Aunt Karen died.  It was a mixture of grief, planning her memorial service, remembering her, and celebrating Jerry. 




I made a berry tart for dessert. 


Elliott really wanted to take a picture of my dad.  He got some interesting shots. 


If you combine the one above and the one below, it's a pretty good picture. 

I helped on this one. 
On Monday my dad fixed the lazy susan that had become quite unbalanced.  Ginger assisted. It also looks like my dad is getting melted with a laser beam, but that's just the Tucson sun. 
As we were packing up to leave Tucson I opened a drawer in the dresser in my former room. My mom might have a problem.  She might need some help. 
We got home Monday afternoon and I finally decided it was time to do something about Elliott's blackhead.  He's had a blackhead on his nose for something like six months. 


He refuses to let me squeeze it, so I put a Biore strip on it. 

It didn't work.  It's still there driving me crazy. 

Any ideas for what I can do?  Should I book an appointment for an aesthetician? Is that taking it too far?