Tuesday, March 14, 2017

Caloric ice cream to start the week and a scorpion to end

I have been trying to write this post for more than a week.  I have started and stopped about six times now.  My apologies for being totally lame.

We have to go allllllllllllllllll the way back to February 27th.  Good lord.  We have to go back to last month!  That's really bad.

After two weeks of not walking, Ginger was released from her arthritis house arrest and was able to walk again.  It's now been two weeks since we've been walking her again and she is still doing fine, so hopefully it was just a one time thing. 
That night I bought pints for Michael and I to eat while we watched The Walking Dead.  He tried to say that his ice cream was less caloric than mine because it had 240 calories.  Then I asked him how many servings there were per pint.  The look on his face when he realized he was about to eat 960 calories to my 280 calories was priceless.  Like, I still wish I was recording it. 

His ice cream. 

My ice cream.  I may have a Halo Top problem.  I may need professional help. 

Monday the 27th was a laundry day.  Ginger will NEVER not sleep on laundry waiting to go in the washer. 

It was hat day at preschool.  This is what Elliott chose to wear.  He said it wouldn't matter that it said Spencer because the kids in preschool can't read cursive anyway. 

We stopped at the park before school.  I hadn't talked to Michael all morning so I texted him two pictures to let him know we were alive.  Just a little wife to husband proof of life. 

Elliott got pulled pork on his forehead at dinner and I was afraid his brains were oozing out. 
And this is what it means to have sons.  You just randomly walk by the bathroom when one of them is in the shower and see Bowser Junior on a motorcycle. 

Monday night Ginger used me as a footrest on the couch. 

And I loved it. 
On Tuesday the 28th both Michael and I were home because our work schedules got totally altered that week because Michael flew to Vermont for his grandfather's funeral.  We took Elliott out to breakfast after Spencer went to school and then went shopping where I bought this wrap dress at a consignment store.  I thought it was funny because it looks like you have to be a stick to wear it, but it's just an illusion from the wrap. 
 Elliott used a bath bomb that he had been given as a Valentine gift for a mid-day bath. The red thing was a bouncy ball that was in the bath bomb. 

Spencer quizzed Elliott on addition, subtraction and multiplication flash cards after dinner.  At Elliott's request.  He's going to know all of his facts before he even starts Kindergarten. 

On Wednesday March 1st Elliott and I drove out to Agritopia and got some treats from Mr. Chad's restaurant.  Then we went to the park again.   Elliott got chocolate zucchini bread and was relieved it didn't taste like zucchini.  Which is weird, because why order it if you are worried it will taste like zucchini. 
Oh, I got coffee too and this black and white basset was at the coffee shop.  I *almost* stole/basset-napped him. 

Wednesday was mismatch day at preschool.  This was my idea.  Not bad. Not bad.

And I discovered a bizarre bruise on Spencer's ear that night.  Only Spencer would get a bruise on his helix. 

Ginger was just her typical cute before bedtime. 

I worked on Thursday the 2nd.  I took down my February door decorations in between 1.4 million therapy sessions. 

I loved the froggies, so I moved them into my office.  They lasted for a week, fell off the wall and then a kid ruined them. 
On Friday this son of a bitch was crawling across my kitchen floor and I prepared dinner in my bare feet.  Michael wasn't home so I had to deal with it on my own.  It involved a lot of smacking and screaming. Then I made him dispose of the body when he got home. 
On Saturday the 4th we changed Elliott's bed sheets which means we organized his stuffed animals.  This is everyone he sleeps with and he will wake up in the middle of the night and then notice if anybody is missing. 

We also got our passport pictures taken, which cost $60 which I find to be completely unacceptable. 

Oh my god.  I did it. 

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