Monday, September 21, 2009

Opinions. Strong Opinions.

One of the things that I was very, very wrong about before I became a mother is that all babies just kind of go with the flow and don't really care about what goes on around them. This may be true about some babies, but it was not the case with my baby. Spencer has had strong ideas and opinions about life and the world around him since the day he was born. I remember watching him toss his head around and grunt and cry while laying in the bassinet in the hospital room the DAY he was born. He wouldn't quiet down until I picked him up. Somehow, at 4 hours old, he knew the difference between "being held" and "not being held" and he very, very, incredibly much preferred being held.

These are some of Spencer's opinions and beliefs about life from when he was younger. They were absolutely unbreakable truths in his mind.

1) Don't let other people hold me. I know it's not you, mom and dad, and I don't like it. These very well may be lovely people, but until they give me back to you I'll be forced to wail. Loudly.

You are a really slow learner aren't you mom?I don't care that I am related to them. I don't want ANYONE but my parents to hold me. For 9 months. #2) I don't do well around crowds. Even small crowds. That other baby may be sleeping and this kid may be smiling, but I need you to take me (right now!) into the laundry room, the closet or the bathroom, close the door and stand in a dark, quiet room with me. I am VERY easily overwhelmed. You will pay for this social gathering for the next 4 days. That's how long it will take for me to recover from the sensory overload you have inflicted on me.#3) This little co-sleeper that you got as a gift is a big waste of money. I will never sleep in it. It's stupid. This is better. Get used to it. We'll be sleeping like this for 10 months. If we don't, I just won't sleep. I'm totally prepared to stay awake for 6, 12, 22 hours. Whatever I need to do to prove my point. #4) This crib? No. Not until I'm 18 months old will we even broach the subject of sleeping in here. I really don't care that you just spent 2 hours and 45 minutes trying to get me to sleep. The second you put me down, even if you do it really gently and keep your hand on me, I'm going to wake up and cry for another 2 hours. #5) Do you think I can't tell that this bouncy chair is not your arms. Pick me up. Immediately.

#6) I absolutely refuse to ride in the snugli until I'm old enough to face out. If you put me in there I will scream so loud you will be afraid the neighbors will call CPS.
#7) The car seat? More like the devil seat. I will scream, at the top of my lungs, each and every time you put me in that thing even if we are going for a 2 hour drive to Tucson. Don't like it. Don't have to. Especially don't like it at night. Yes, I'm 2 months old, but I can tell the difference between day and night. And at night, I'm gonna scream even louder.

#8) Don't dress me in weird clothes. Because I have no problem with crying through the entire Christmas eve mass and then the entire Christmas dinner even after you take me out of this outfit.
Seriously. Spencer has been opinionated since Day 1. He is the child for which "pick your battles" is the theme, the rule and the saving grace.

These are some of Spencer's new, more recent opinions:

#1) If I take a bath, I will drip dry afterwards. If I take a shower I want to be dried off with a towel. A towel with a hood. And only dad can do it. After the bath only dad can put my eczema creams on but only mom can dress me.

#2) I don't like the outfits you pick any more. I will dress myself daily from now on, thank you very much.

#3) I will continue eating with my rubber baby spoons, but forks need to be from the adult set. I will refuse to eat, even my favorite foods, unless you abide by this.

#4) No more sitting in the grocery cart. I know I did it and did it well for well over a year. I've changed my mind now. You can carry me or I'll help push.

#5) I'm not sitting in the booster seat anymore. I'm just not. No explanation needed.
I'm dubious about this big boy "not a booster" that mom and dad built for me out of wood, quilt batting and extra fabric. I may reject it. I may not. It's anybody's guess.

When Spencer was 3 months old and I was seconds away from a nervous breakdown/needing to go on anti-anxiety medication I found a bunch of information on Dr. Sears' website about high needs babies. One thing was a list of 12 characteristics that distinguish a high needs baby from other, lower needs babies. Spencer had all 12 characteristics. All 12. It was like reading a list written about him. I have been told, by multiple people, and in reading multiple books that really difficult babies/toddlers grow up to be really bright and engaging kids/teens/adults.
God I hope so.


The Yager Family said...

Ahhh good times! So when is baby #2 coming...


Maryellen said...

Dude. Good thing Spencer's such a cutie.


Team Eliza said...

Watch out world . . . Spencer is a man with a plan!

The GVZ's said...

I know it isn't always fun to live through, but it is hysterical to read!